while i still have sticky fingers, i thought i'd reprint this from sister wolf over at goddammit i'm mad. she clears up what a douche is, though i believe a douche & a jerk can be of either sex, but a scumbag (& tool) is just for the guys. feel free to chime in. i reprinted her comments 2 inspire u.
& thanks for the great dialog about the douche of the entry hall roundup.
from goddammit i'm mad:
Scumbags, Douches and Jerks
November 23rd, 2009Tonight, some friends and I were discussing some mutual acquaintances. It emerged that there was some confusion about how to categorize certain types of men we disdain.
To me, a Douche is instantly recognizable as such. He doesn’t have to exhibit any behavior; he’s just a Douche. Sometimes a Douche can increase his douchiness by bad behavior, like John Mayer, but usually it’s a done deal. Keith Urban is a Douche.
So is Pete Wentz and David Duchovny.
Joe Perry ( as per this photo from the American Music Awards show) is a Scumbag.
Whereas, Steven Tyler is a Douche. Snoop Dogg = Scumbag. Mickey Rourke, another Scumbag.
Trying to think of a Jerk, my first thought was Levi Johnston, god bless him. Jerks are more innocent than Scumbags or Douches. I even think that a Jerk could be reformable; he could wise up, theoretically anyway. Douches and Scumbags are lost causes.
I used to be able to explain the difference between a Tool and a Jerk, but I honestly can’t remember the criteria. All I remember was that some guy named Jason (who happened to be a fishmonger) was a complete Tool.
Where do you stand on these categories, and who do you think best epitomizes a Douche, Scumbag, Jerk or Tool?
Responses to “Scumbags, Douches and Jerks”
Make Do Style Says: Dexter seems to have summed it up - jerk, douche, scumbag I’m easily annoyed by them so have to avoid.
TobiLynne Says: I think you pretty much nailed the categories. I’d say a tool is somewhere between a douchebag and a jerk. Maybe a douche is a douche by nature, and a jerk is a jerk by nurture (hence being reformable). A tool could go either way, but likely the way of the douche. Douchebags: Pretty much everyone in Oasis, Rush Limbaugh Scumbags: Jim Baker, Jimmy Swaggert Tools: Ashton Kutcher, all contestants of American Idol Jerks: David Letterman, Bob Dylan
dust Says: I think I left the jerk-tool in the scumbag on my piano this morning… (Douche is still a new word to me…)
Dena Says: Although I am impressed by the varying degrees of jerk/tool/douchedom I would largely just file them all in the drawer labeled “cocks”.
Kate Says: Dexter sums it up. From the pictures you provided and from the looks of the people who usually get called “douche,” it seems to hinge upon over-accessorizing and trying to look dirty when the (hu)man in question is too immaculately groomed or purposely disheveled to be rugged. This would naturally include most fashion bloggers, g-d love ‘em. Scumbags are aware of how morally and aesthetically questionable they are and choose to own it, even in the face of absurdity (like the Olsen twins, Martha Stewart, all of the Beatles but Ringo, and, yeah, Snoop). “Scumbag” is like a wannabe cunt. Jerks and tools are peons of petty meanness with little to no awareness of their resentful aura (probably most journalists fall into this category).
Beck Says: Here in the UK I think the corresponding terms would be wanker, arsehole, prick and dickhead. Crucial difference between a prick and a dickhead is that secretly you might quite fancy a man who is a prick, but you’d definitely never find a dickhead attractive. Cocks applies to all here too.
dexter vandango Says: TobiLynne.. I understand all your entries… but what has Dylan done to make him a jerk..? Is there something I haven’t heard???
(I’m not one who thinks him a god or perfect.. I am just curious..)
insomnia Says: Ok, so based on what I see here it is primarily a matter of intention that separates these animals. On a sliding scale of, say, Jesus Christ to…um…Bill O’Rielly, it is the level (or lack) of self-awareness that determines where they rank in the pantheon of idiots. For instance, if I am a bonehead and remain oblivious to how thoughtless/lame/played out I am, I rank somewhat lower on the scale than my friend, who behaves poorly and KNOWS that he is being a dick (but possibly can’t help himself owing to some matter of genetics, or constitutional weakness.) And standing at the pinnacle are those who are deliberate assholes for some particular reason, to achieve a defined objective. I get it. The only problem is that there are too many! Unless someone practically comes out and declares their status as a scumbag, too much is left for the people observing the behavior. It is like being the diving judge at a kids swim meet. If they emerge from the water bleeding, or miss the pool completely, it is an easy call (ie.the parents of the balloon boy). Anything short of that and it is a little tough to call. You see one thing, I see another (like the Bob Dylan thing, above). I like Beck’s take. Just call them all (me included) “cocks” I kinda like Kate’s read on this.
TobiLynne Says: Re: Dylan … I think he’s played an enormous role in our popular culture over the years, he’s a humanitarian, and I think he’s a genuinely good man. I don’t think he’s ill-intentioned (likely just protecting his privacy), but to go out of your way for 40+ years to remain “mysterious” by misleading the press and his fans is a little jerk-ish if you ask me. Based on SW’s standards (innocent intentions, but still come off as kind of an ass), I think he’s a jerk. I also think he’s smart, funny, and adorable, and would have let him keep his shoes under my bed until he grew that stupid fucking mustache.
Mark Says: Douches ALWAYS dress age-inappropriately in expensive versions of mid-American mall crap meant for teen boys with ambiguous sexuality. See photo of Keith Urban above. I would say Joe Perry is a douche, too, not a scumbag. Well, maybe a scummy douchebag. Pete Wentz is the mother of all douches. I think he needs to get beaten up by a bunch of militant gay men sick of closeted douches.
Bevitron Says: Oh, my head is swimming! I’ll never get this right. Definitely see Rourke as a scumbag but woulda put Duchovny in the jerk slot. I guess I’ll stick with the default “asshole”. I wonder…is there a difference between asshole and just plain ass? The addition of the hole seems to indicate a level of depravity not attained by the mere ass. Is it okay, when referring to a douche, to use douchebag, or does that alter category completely?
Alicia Says: I like the overarching category of man-cunt. Categorizing takes too much work.
arline Says: My last boyfriend seemed nice at first. He started to act like a jerk and morphed into a douchebag. Yesterday I was driving, and I saw his tragic ass. I now just see him as pitiful.